plug it

Breathing keeps me awake at night.

Not my own breathing of course. That's the stuff that keeps me alive. I mean listening to other people suck air makes it nearly impossible for me to regulate my own breath and goddamn fall asleep. So I have devised a way (i.e. purchased a product) to remedy this most frustrating of situations.

My ear plugs are a mellow shade of canteloupe. They squish and expand in a mildly entertaining, creepingly slow fashion. But when I place them in my ears, they perform magic.

Squish. Shove in. Let it crackle.

It's a soft crackle, an aural teleportation to a Land of No Noise. No annoying air suckers, no wind, no cat pushing around a plastic bell-ball. There really is no world outside my ear drums if I don't hear it.

I never thought something so foam and simple could turn my life around.